Monday, January 19, 2009


Some of you may have noticed the lapse in my posting. The reason is that my husband, Mike, of over 42 years died very suddenly last week. I'm trying to work through this the best I can and I'm hoping that putting some thoughts down in writing might help. Bear with me!!!

Since Allison left home about 18 years ago, it's just been him and me in this house. Everything reminds me of him from the closed garage doors when I come home to the crumbs around the couch where he always laid. But luckily, I don't feel emptiness in this house. This house holds the best of memories and I feel him still here with me. It's still my sanctuary.

I have the best support system anybody could possibly have and I'm always aware of God beside me. So in the days to come, I'll try not to do too much whining but please be patient with me.


Debra said...

love you, Jan.

Primitiques 'n Poetry said...

Oh, Jan. I just saw this. There can't really be any words...But, tears are brimming as I write. I am so sorry. In 42 years, the love that you shared and the memories that you made...I will keep you in my prayers. ~Mindy

lorhen82 said...

I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through, but my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. You are fortunate to have had so many years with a man whom you love, and who loved you back. May your memories be always be a comfort to you.


Tracy said...

I have been having such a bad day, well hard last ten days actually but now I read your post and my heart just breaks for you.
I can't imagine what you must be going through....I'm so sorry for your loss and I wish I knew words to help you through this time.
I do hope you know that there are people out there thinking of you and praying for you.

David said...

I'm so sorry. Prayer sent.

Ragamuffin Gal said...

I love you too gal and am looking forward to seeing you soon! Here is an idea, The One World, One Heart event is going on (started today) and it is a great way to meet new blog friends and get your blog out there with way more traffic. Go to my blog and click on the link (be sure to enter my give away first)and read more about it and think about whether or not you want to do it. Either way it is fun to play along. Many Blessings Dear Heart.

time-worn interiors said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, my heart goes out to you!

Garden Antqs Vintage said...

Jan: I'm so sorry to hear this. May God comfort you and your family during this time! I'll be praying for you.

Sweet Repose said...

Jan, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. My daughter and I were just talking today about how many memories are harbored in their house, her husband of only 10 years, succumbed to his brain cancer a year and a half ago. She's still dealing with the emptiness, but trying to move on.

Have faith and know that we are all praying for you and your family.


Barbsigns4u said...

I had been so happy & excited anticipating the inauguration and knowing we shared the same thoughts & feelings, and then when I received your e-mail about Mike, my heart just sank with sadness for you and Alison, Sage, Phoebe & Stella. I'm so sorry, Jan. I love you, sister.
Hugs & Peace

delighted heart said...

Jan I'm so sorry for the loss of your husband. Praying God's peace and comfort over you and your family. Clinging to Him with gratitude for all the memories was what made it easier after my mom died 2 years ago. I decided when I started my blog in Dec. that it would be my little talk with her each day. I wrote about it under "Meme". It's ok to cry and it's ok to even get mad just don't ever ever give up! Mike wouldn't want you to give up but to go on living. Even though you have all these memories of Mike...he's really not in your past anymore... he's in your future! And in that we can rejoice! My heart goes out to you.... BIG HUGS!

kristi delawder said...

Jan-If God had come to you 42 years ago and told you that you had the chance to meet the love of your life, you will marry, you will have a beautiful daughter who will give you 3 precious grandchildren but there is a catch...he will leave this earth after 42 glorious years of marriage and you still want to meet this guy...I'm sure that you would have said YES! I know the pain is deep and the feelings of emptiness but you are such a great lady and we will continue to celebrate Mike's life and the love that you share. Kristi

trash talk said...

Jan, you don't know me but Sharon at Sweet Repose sent me over. I am truly sorry and saddened over your loss. I've been married for 36 yrs and we have lived in the same house for 33 yrs of that time. I know what you are saying about the memories. Time and again we have talked about moving, but I can't figure out a way to box up the memories so we stay put. Your words were so touching and I know God will see you through this and carry the load for you. There really are no words to express what I would like to say, but I've heard it said "the sadness and pain are a reminder of how much we loved and how much we were loved". I don't know if this helps. I will keep you in my prayers and if you need someone to talk to. come on over. God bless you and your family-Debbie

Frippery said...

I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. Know that there are many out in blogland praying for you. Pam

lovesoldstuff said...

You are in my prayers. I am so very sorry for your loss.

Colleen said...

I somehow came across your blog and wanted to extend my condolences. I can only imagine your shock and grief over the sudden, unexpected death of your husband. You will be in my prayers.


Jan (J.T.) Thomason said...

Oh, I am so very sorry to read that your husband died.
It sounds like you are firmly grounded in our Lord and I know that will help - I don't want to sound trite when I say that because I know that you are in pain. And, I also know that there are no words - so here's a hug alllll the way from Texas. *hug*

Again, I am so very sorry,
Warmly, Jan

Doreen said...

Oh Jan..I'm SO SORRY.....I had no idea...I can not begin to imagine how you are feeling....please know you are in my thought and prayers.

Sending you a very warm and large hug.