Thursday, January 22, 2009

A beautiful day in January

It was a beautiful, sunny, warm day today and I hung my sheets on the line. It's so good to do normal things again. My sisters came and helped me move some furniture and to cheer me up. I don't know what I would do without them. Also, my friend Annie needs tablecloths made for a party she's catering. Life goes on!

This is the first time in my life that I've been alone. I went from my parent's house to Mike's & mine. Probably because I was next to the youngest in a large family, I was over-protected. I learned to cook & take care of a checking account after I was married. Probably because Mike was the oldest in the family & his dad was in the service, he was a natural caretaker so that was what he did with me for most of our married life. Fortunately for me, I needed independence so I tried, without hurting his ego to let him know that I could and wanted to be a strong partner and have an equal say in our lives. My hope is that I am as strong as I feel I am and can have a long happy life without my kids thinking they have to worry about me.

It's so strange how this blogging thing came into my life just at the right time. I have lots of friends and family but for some reason I feel like I've earned every friend on this blog just by your reading my words & thoughts -- the real me. I can't ever tell you how much your thoughts, prayers, and encouragement has meant to me. On a journal entry of my husband's we found the words "let go and let God" and it's been my mantra over the last few days. It's helped! Thanks, again.

4 comments:

Primitiques 'n Poetry said...

Hi Jan. Surrounded by sisters and sheets on the line. It does sound like a good day. My bet is that you have indeed, become a strong capable woman. Business women tend to have it together, sometimes more than even they know. It's good to read your words. Indeed. Let go and let God. It's a good mantra. Happy day, my friend. ~Mindy

David said...

Let go and let God. Indeed!

I've gone through divorce. I lost my dad to cancer. I've watched how my mom has handled adjusting to a new life without him. If I may be so bold, let me just toss out a few things that have helped me and/or my mom. These are just suggestions. You will know which (if any) are right for you and you can discard the rest.

Be extra kind to yourself during this time. Give yourself permission to focus on yourself a lot more than usual. Take long bubble baths, burn scented candles, play soft music, exercise, get a massage, pedicure or whatever it is that helps you feel comforted. Spoil yourself a little; it's perfectly ok.

Keep those sisters around to talk to. Do things with them. If you happen to have trouble sleeping, try some self-hypnosis CDs. And when the grief builds up too much, just go off to a room by yourself and have a few minutes of a good old fashioned pitty party. Some hard crying never hurt anyone. That's like a pressure relief valve and sometimes it's the only thing that'll let you get to that place where you can function again.

Grieving is a long slow process. Unfortunately, there are no shortcuts, but I truly believe that taking extra good care of yourself makes it a little easier to manage.

Sorry so long-winded!! God bless you. Prayer sent.

trash talk said...

I'm glad to hear you had a beautiful day. I love your mantra and I don't think it was an accident you found it when you did. I truly believe God whispers to us if we listen and I believe He whispered to you. Debbie

dulcy said...

Hi Jan,

Miss you and hope to get in the shop to visit soon. You're in my thoughts.

xo
dulcy